1. What attitudes, experiences, and family dynamics do each of these abused individuals share in common? What is unique about their stories?
2. What do you learn about the social issue of "elder abuse" from the stories in this video? What insights are revealed about the "cycle of abuse"?
3. In what ways are the living arrangements relating to the abuser and the abused a crucial variable in all of these stories?
4. What was your impression of the dynamics between the abusers, the abused, family members, and the various counselors portrayed interacting with them? What was most effective about the counselor’s problem solving? What was most frustrating about these interactions?
5. At the close of the video, the director notes, "The goal of those who work with such cases its to empower the victims to make his or her own choices, explore with them what those choices are and what the consequences may be for the choices they make." To what extent were these individuals "empowered" through their interactions with counselors? NORMAN:
6. Why won’t Norman either leave home or ask his sons to move out? What does he seem to want in the relationships with his son and wife?
7. Norman refers to his wife a few times in this segment. What perspective would she offer on Norman’s dilemma? To what extent may she be a contributing factor to the abuse?
8. In what ways does Norman’s attitude about himself as "an old man" affect his dilemma?
9. Norman doesn’t appear in a counseling session with a social services representative or a psychologist. What are some of the goals a counselor might suggest?
10. What does "family" mean to Norman? How is that "ideal" concept in conflict with reality?
    DOROTHY AND GARY:
11. What does Dorothy want to change in her relationship with her son Gary? What variables are preventing her from achieving her goals?
12. What needs to happen in the family dynamics expressed here in order for Dorothy’s life to improve? What are the chances it will happen? Why?
13. Analyze Gary’s nonverbals in the counseling session. What is revealed by those nonverbals?
14. Why does Gary act so defensive? What strategies does he employ to sidetrack discussions of possible changes in the dynamics of his relationship with his mother?
    PAT:
15. When people think of battered women’s shelters, they may think of young or middle-aged women who have suffered spousal abuse. How does Pat’s story broaden your understanding of the problem of spousal abuse?
16. What issues relating to Pat’s self-esteem are most prevalent in this segment? How would a counselor address this concern directly?
17. Early in the segment Pat says, "He’s got my brains like scrambled eggs." Translate that metaphor into an analytical framework. What is Pat really saying here?
18. What does Pat’s story reveal about the "cycle of abuse"? What insights has she gained through her experience?
19. What was your emotional response to seeing Pat interact with her husband at home after his stroke?
    LUCILLE:
20. Lucille’s story is the second in the film to focus on spousal abuse. What insights could we have gained if he had been present in this segment?
21. What was positive and effective about the counselor’s interaction with the daughter? Why won’t the daughter listen to the counselor?
22. What was your impression of the daughter, based on her comments and nonverbals in this segment? Why does the daughter insist that her mother "not" be alone in the house during the day?
23. In what ways do Lucille’s disabilities and infirmities make her even more vulnerable to abuse than other elders?
    MARY:
24. What was your emotional response to the photographs taken of Mary after she was beaten by her son? How does the use of those photographs provide a perspective on the other abusive relationships portrayed in the video?
25. Why does the director choose to end the video with this segment? How does Mary’s response to her abuse differ from the other four elders?
26. Evaluate the effectiveness of the counselor’s advice to Mary at the end of the segment. What is the counselor trying to help Mary understand about herself? In what ways are Pat’s responses to her son related to long-standing problems of low self-esteem.

Sample Worksheet

Below is a list of comments made by elders who have suffered abuse at the hands of family members. In each case, consider the following questions:

1. What does the comment reveal about the dynamics of the elder’s relationship with spouse or adult child?
2. What does the comment reveal about the "cycle of abuse"? How does the comment reflect societal attitudes toward abuse? Toward old age?
3. What does the comment reveal about the abused elder’s self-esteem, emotional and psychological needs, personal growth, or self-actualization?

• "I always think it’s going to get better. It only lasts so long."
• "If I go back, it’ll happen again. And maybe they’ll kill me one of these days."
• "I’m 77, where can I go?"

• "It comes as such a surprise to me always because I never really expect it from him."
• "I think it would be wiser [if we lived in] two separate places. I haven’t wanted to. I’ve tried to argue myself out of it. . . ."

• "He's got my brains like scrambled eggs," she says. "All I want is peace and quiet--nobody harassing me."
• "Look how many years I’ve wasted by thinking he’s going to change. I felt sorry for him. I wanted to nurture him. I felt I could handle him."
• "My emotional state when I came here was that life wasn’t worth living--that I would be better off dead. I was thinking of ways I could commit suicide without leaving a mess."
• "And I am bound and determined I am going to have peace and quiet."
• "I never thought I had a life. When I came here the last time I was hopeless. But now you have given me a little hope."

• "You get three chances in life. He said he was sorry. I couldn’t understand what I had done wrong. [I thought], "He’ll outgrow it. He was 19."
• "He has to learn sometime. I’m very bitter. I love him, but this time I can not forgive him. Maybe I’m wrong."
• [If he knocked at my door], "You know yourself, being a mother, you would let him in."

The Great Circle of Life--Home Page

Text of The Great Circle of Life: A Resource Guide to Films and Videos on Aging, copyright © 1987, 1999, 2005, Robert E. Yahnke. All photographs copyrighted by Robert E. Yahnke.  All rights reserved.  Contact author for permission to copy photographs or reprint portions of text.

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