Loneliness is
an
aching void in the center of our beings,
a deep longing to love and be loved,
to be fully known and accepted by
at least one other person.
It is a hollow, haunting sound
sweeping
thru our depths,
chilling our bones and causing us
to shiver.
Is there a
person,
anywhere,
who has never felt the stab of
loneliness,
who has never experienced the eerie
distance of isolation and separation,
who has never suffered the pain of
rejection or the loss of love?
The final
rupture
or breakdown of a valued loving relationship,
the sudden death of someone who was
close and special,
an unavoidable separation from a
loved one
—these things strike loneliness into
our hearts,
the intense experience of the absence
of that specific person.
But sometimes
loneliness
has no name attached.
This is the general feeling of being
alone, isolated, separated from others.
And there is a
third kind of loneliness—existential loneliness—
which is even deeper and more
pervasive
than either of the first two.
It often disguises itself as longing
for a specific person
or pretends to be yearning for
contact with anyone,
but this deeper lack or
emptiness-of-being
is not really a kind of loneliness
at all.
Being together with other people,
even people we intensely love,
does not overcome this deep
incompleteness
of being.
This inner default of selfhood has
never been solved by love,
no matter how good and close and
warm that love might be.
OUTLINE:
1. Loneliness
for
a Specific Person.
2. Loneliness
for Other People in General.
3. Existential
Loneliness.
I. Five Differences between
Interpersonal
Loneliness and Existential Loneliness
II. How Does it Feel to be Existentially Lonely?
III. Attempting to Cope with Existential Loneliness
IV. The Authentic Response to Existential Loneliness
V. Beyond Existential Loneliness
James Park is
an
existential philosopher.
This presentation is based on the
first chapter of his longest book:
Our
Existential Predicament: Loneliness, Depression, Anxiety, & Death,
Chapter 1 "Existential
Loneliness".
A shorter
version
of this chapter is available free of charge here:
"Interpersonal
Loneliness & Spiritual Loneliness",
which is the first chapter of his
small book
Opening
to Grace: Transcending Our Spiritual Malaise.
An even shorter
version (just three pages) will be found here:
"Loneliness
of Spirit: Deeper than the Reach of Love"
Return to Top 40 Sermon Subjects by James Park.
Return to UNITARIAN-UNIVERSALISM PAGE.
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beginning
of this home page:
An
Existential Philosopher's Museum.