a 3-session mini-course on love
held in Coffman Memorial Union (354)
on Friday afternoons at 3:15-5:00 PM.
This first session was attended by a total of 14 people,
including James Park, the discussion leader.
He asked participants to identify how they were drawn to this discussion:
5 came as a direct result of talking with members
of the Forum Committee of the Program Council,
which was the sponsor of this mini-course.
4 read about the mini-course in the Coffman Insider.
2 people came in response to the ad in the Daily on the same day.
1 saw the red poster in Blagen Hall on campus.
It was a surprise to the discussion leader
that none of the 30+ people who had attended the
"Romantic Love is a Hoax!" program the previous Friday attended
the first session of this mini-course.
Perhaps they knew that the first hour would be devoted to the same theme.
But these new people engaged in a lively discussion
of romantic love, sharing their own experiences with this emotional game.
Only about half stayed for the second theme "Loving from Authenticity".
It turned out that the three scheduled sessions were more like independent events,
because only one person attended all three meetings.
On Feb. 27 the subject will be "Loving Freely without Needing".
This was the least popular theme.
Only two people (plus the leader) participated in the full two hour discussion,
altho two other people (one being a member of the Forum Committee)
dropped in for about half an hour each.
So the total people who took any part in "Loving Freely without Needing"
was 5.
On Mar. 6, we will look at "Multiple Loving without Jealousy".
A total of 7 people (including the leader) attended this meeting.
And a lively discussion was enjoyed by all.
These seem to be more popular themes
than freedom or needing.
In the future at the University, this series (if offered again)
will probably be publicized as independent events,
each with it own title as the uppermost attraction.
The two best titles of this season were:
"Romantic Love is a Hoax! Emotional Programming to 'Fall in Love'"
and "Multiple Loving without Jealousy".
Those who wish to read beyond the title
may discover that it is a part of a series.
But participation in previous parts of the series
would not be expected or required.
Another difference from expectation
was that none of the participants bought copies of
New Ways of Loving: How Authenticity Transforms Love.
So it was not a discussion based on participants having done any reading in advance.
Instead, James Park presented the basic ideas of each chapter
and the discussion proceeded from there.
All in all these three events were positive events
for the people who took part.
All participants were students at the University of Minnesota,
except one who was brought by a woman who was a student.
{Footnote on programming for college students:
Hypothesis: For every student who attends an event,
1 or 2 other students have read the publicity and almost attended
but decided against it at the last minute for some trivial reason
(such as rain on Feb. 27).
So, instead of focusing on the hundreds of students who are indifferent to the program,
we ought to focus on those who are somewhat interested
and who need just a little extra incentive to pass the threshold of resistance.
Some examples of possible trivial reasons that prevented attendance:
1. The start time was 'off' by 15 minutes either way.
Students have very limited time, so they can't wait even 15 minutes for something.
These sessions might have been better attended if they had started at 3:30 instead of 3:15.
2. The course description was slightly garbled somewhere in the process
so it looked like the program was put together by people who were not too bright.
(For example, the publicity for this series said that there was a DIFFERENCE
between choice and flexibility when exercising freedom in loving relationships.
The original information said that choice and flexibility (on the one hand)
would be contrasted with security and obligation (on the other hand). )
3. The mention of any dollar figures in the course description,
even for optional items such as the book, turns many students off.
They know that they spend many hundreds of dollars a year for required textbooks,
but they have no extra money for books they want to read for their own edification.
Therefore, if this New Ways of Loving is offered as a series again,
possible purchase of the book will not be mentioned.
No one bought it anyway.
And who knows how many students
were discouraged by those terrible symbols : $10?
4. Wrong room numbers can also discourage students
who are on the threshold of attending.
If it does not seem to be where they originally thought it was going to be,
they just give up.
(This mistake did not happen for "New Ways of Loving",
but it was a problem in the University of Minnesota Calendar of Events
listing for "Romantic Love is a Hoax!")
5. The words used to describe the presenter may tip the scales one way or another.
For example, did the words "Humanist Campus Minister" for this event
attract more people than they discouraged?
"Existential philosopher" was probably not as confusing and/or controversial.
Perhaps a survey of random students would be able to determine
whether such descriptions do more harm or more good.}
This report written by James Park, the discussion leader,
March 7, 1998, immediately after the third and last meeting.