THE MOST COMMON
"Masculinity/Femininity: Loving Beyond Our
because much popular writing deals with the
conventional differences between men and women,
many readers open this chapter with the same expectation.
They think that this chapter is also going to say
that men are such-and-such
and that women are the
This presupposition is so strong in some readers
that their preconception is what they find in this chapter,
even tho it is denied on almost every page.
This chapter takes the radically-different stance
that all of the personality-traits of all individuals
are originally given by enculturation.
And because these gender stereotypes are merely conventional,
they can be changed thru various processes of personal growth.
Rather than comparing and contrasting men and women,
this approach to gender-personality
compares and contrasts admirable traits and regrettable
(These traits are listed in separate columns.
On each side of the
one column is labeled "admirable" and another "regrettable".)
Solving the problems created by our original
does not involve becoming more like the other sex.
Rather, we identify the personality-traits we do not like in ourselves
and then undertake various processes of personal growth
that will make us more fully the persons we want to be.
In this new
way of loving, we first re-create our selves
by moving beyond our original gender-personalities.
Then we are ready to love as the new persons we have become.
revised 8-4-2007; 1-4-2012;
If you would like to read the first two pages of
this chapter, click
Loving Beyond Our Gender-Personalities" .
The first page contains the complete table of contents for this