THE INTERNET
When I got back to work this evening I discovered that the Internet had gone out for the night with it's more fun, more-important-than-me friends. So here I am at a coffee shop using their Internet (nyeh!), which makes me feel crunchy. Coincidentally, that's the perfect forced segue to my next point of order.
My whole life I've grown up with creamy peanut butter, and I don't regret a minute of it. There's nothing like piping hot toast with some creamy, smooth peanut butter slathered all over it. Just pop it in your mouth and let it be overrun with a deluge of goodness. Do not distort the meaning of my last sentence.
However, when it comes to cold sandwiches such as PB&J, nothing quite compares to the heartiness (if one can use such a modifier in relation to peanut butter) of the crunchy variety. Those quasi-intact peanuts leave you feeling like you actually ate something of value rather than the flaccid, bready concoction that it actually was.
Now, Jif has another kid in the family: Jif EXTRA CRUNCHY Peanut Butter.
E.C. is what I've been putting on my sandwiches recently. I'll admit that E.C. is a little too crunchy for my tastes, even though I can still appreciate it. However, I really need a little more creaminess in there in order to emotionally feel the cohesiveness of the paste and be truly satisfied. Why, then, do I choose it over the Regular Crunchy (R.C.) variety? Because, my comrades, I have no choice. I have no choice because R.C. has been labeled (in a green banner near the top of the label) as "Reduced Fat." Any food that is so labeled has historically been red-flagged and black listed in my mind.
Why?
I really have no logical reason. You might as well add it to the list of my other compulsions. The fact of the matter is, however, that my taste buds shrivel at the sight. Therefore, until this ban of un-health on R.C. is lifted, I will be stuck in a peanut buttery limbo.
Not quite peanut butter heaven, but not quite peanut butter hell. Rather, it is a peanut butter purgatory in which I pay my penance.
Today's exercise tally: 70 curls, 35 pushups.
My whole life I've grown up with creamy peanut butter, and I don't regret a minute of it. There's nothing like piping hot toast with some creamy, smooth peanut butter slathered all over it. Just pop it in your mouth and let it be overrun with a deluge of goodness. Do not distort the meaning of my last sentence.
However, when it comes to cold sandwiches such as PB&J, nothing quite compares to the heartiness (if one can use such a modifier in relation to peanut butter) of the crunchy variety. Those quasi-intact peanuts leave you feeling like you actually ate something of value rather than the flaccid, bready concoction that it actually was.
Now, Jif has another kid in the family: Jif EXTRA CRUNCHY Peanut Butter.
E.C. is what I've been putting on my sandwiches recently. I'll admit that E.C. is a little too crunchy for my tastes, even though I can still appreciate it. However, I really need a little more creaminess in there in order to emotionally feel the cohesiveness of the paste and be truly satisfied. Why, then, do I choose it over the Regular Crunchy (R.C.) variety? Because, my comrades, I have no choice. I have no choice because R.C. has been labeled (in a green banner near the top of the label) as "Reduced Fat." Any food that is so labeled has historically been red-flagged and black listed in my mind.
Why?
I really have no logical reason. You might as well add it to the list of my other compulsions. The fact of the matter is, however, that my taste buds shrivel at the sight. Therefore, until this ban of un-health on R.C. is lifted, I will be stuck in a peanut buttery limbo.
Not quite peanut butter heaven, but not quite peanut butter hell. Rather, it is a peanut butter purgatory in which I pay my penance.
Today's exercise tally: 70 curls, 35 pushups.
"ma'am"
1 Comments:
But, doesn't it makes sense that you're trying to lose 10 pounds, that you would choose the Reduced Fat Regular Crunchy over the Extra Crunchy?
Oh, by the way, "We're comin' to America!" (my version of Neil Diamond.) :D
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