Usually we will be in close communication with our
families
whenever we are coming to the end of our lives.
The people who are closest to us will know about our health conditions
and they might already be deeply involved in our medical decisions.
If we have appointed family members to be our
proxies,
these persons will obviously be involved in any life-ending decisions.
But we might come to the end of our lives
when our only remaining family members are distant and uninvolved.
In such cases, it might be wise for us to notify them
that we are considering bring our lives to an end.
Any such notification will give others the
opportunity to respond
in any ways that seem appropriate to them.
Some will want to know more about the situation
that is leading us to consider voluntary death.
They might have some matters they want to complete with us
before we take the final actions that will bring death.
All the laws and proposed laws that mention
notifying next of kin
allow this to be an optional
safeguard.
Under such provisions,
the patient might decided to keep the planned death completely secret.
Each person facing death should decide just whom to notify
and how much detail to share with each person who might want to know.
HOW NOTIFYING FAMILY MEMBERS
DISCOURAGES IRRATIONAL SUICIDE
AND OTHER FORMS OF PREMATURE DEATH
However, whenever a dying patient does involve
family members
at least to the extent of letting them know of the impending death
there are meaningful opportunities for family members
to intervene to
prevent what might otherwise be an irrational suicide.
If someone believes he or she has a disease,
a concerned relative might insist that this be confirmed by doctors
before any planning for death goes forward.
Some people have killed themselves
under the mistaken belief that they were dying of cancer
when an autopsy later proved that they did not have cancer after all.
Even when the patient really does have a terminal
disease,
notifying family members might result in a more meaningful last few
days or months.
It would be premature to opt for death
when some family members are willing to care for the patient
until he or she reaches a more appropriate time to die.
When family members are involved in the
death-planning process,
the whole family can take part in the discussion of the best time for
death.
And the family members will not be surprised to learn of a sudden death,
which they will probably regard as premature
if they wanted to offer more support and care for the dying person.
Several of the other safeguards ask for the
opinions of family members.
Involving people who are close to us
does not necessarily mean that we will postpone death.
If all who know the full situation agree that death now is better than death later,
then the involvement of family will make this a more meaningful death.
And the support of family members can help the patient to choose
not only the best time to die but also the best means.